B24

When will I learn to follow my gut and stick to my rules? The rules are there for a reason. I am still a little raw because I have officially lost contact with B23. After our exchanges almost a week ago he has totally stopped responding. This annoys me to no end, but I know there is nothing I can do about it. I'm honestly considering talking to the next guy I get serious with and just asking him to please let me know when he's done with me. It's so much nicer to just get a text message letting me know he's not interested than sitting around and wondering what the fuck is going on. So I have somehow frightened off another bachelor. Drats.

I had decided that I really wasn't going to search for any more bachelors until after the holidays. My heart just needs a break even though I know my vagina will be angry. I was on OKC Friday afternoon when I get a message from B24. I checked out his profile and he's really kinky and a little cocky so I figure I'm going to have some fun with this guy. He's one of those types who thinks that girls can't 'handle' him. I immediately put him in his place and let him know that the kinky stuff does not frighten me off. We chat for a bit and then he makes a comment about inviting himself over to my apartment. I respond that there is not way in hell that is happening and that I thought that was a typical douche bag response. He apologizes, we chat for a bit more and he asks for my phone number. I give it to him, but am really not impressed with this guy.

Also, his two pics he has posted are a little dark and fuzzy so I can't really see what he looks like. His profile says he is 38 and white so I don't really think too hard about this. I also figure there is always the chance to ask for more pictures. So on Saturday he texts me and pretty much sets up a date within 5 minutes. He's so forward that I don't even realize I've agreed to a date until it's over. I figure what the hell. I have a Saturday night free and I should go out and have fun. I tell myself that this could be a good opportunity and that I should be spontaneous. This could be the guy I've been waiting for.

Turns out that he is NOT the guy I was expecting. First off he looks more like 48 and he's not white. I immediately believe him to be Arabic and I'm not too excited about that. I've dated Arabic and Indian men and they are just not for me. He looks like the men who wear gold chains and run family style restaurants back in Northwest Indiana. Also, he's not even good looking so there is no sexual desire on my part at all. He even kisses my hand when we first meet and this makes my skin crawl. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

So we find a table and have a few beers. Turns out he was born in Cyprus and raised in Montreal, but has lived in the states for about 13 years. He's a medical engineer (which means he makes a lot of money) and loves to read self help books. He enjoys dancing (especially Latin) and has been dating a lot of Eastern European women who are not kinky. I am so not into him.

At this point I know that this date is a waste of lipstick. I kindly sit through one a half beers and then I decide to be straight with him. I let him know that i am not feeling it and that I don't think it will work between us. The sad thing is that I think he was on a way better date than I was. He was nice enough to talk to and I felt it was my duty to introduce him to the kinky community and FetLife, but there was not way in hell that I was going to go on a second date with this guy let alone get into bed with him.

The moral of the story is that I had signs and just choose to ignore him. First off his messages were in broken English, but I just thought he was typing too fast and didn't have spell check or something. Second, always get a few good (recent) pictures. Third, if they seem too forward there is probably a reason for that. Confidence is okay, but being cocky can district you from finding out some important information before you jump into a date.