Bedding Bachelor #4

Maybe I do have a little more Samantha Jones in me than I thought. As you all know I have a case of the raging hormones. I also feel very unfulfilled with the guys I've been dating. I can't seem to find that combo of sexual and intellectual stimulation. So, I did something that I NEVER thought I would do - I arranged a casual hook-up. That's right, Bachelor #4 is just for sex.

My friend recently reminded me of a time a year ago where I was absolutely appalled at a guy who wanted to do a causal hook up with me. I found it really skeezy and didn't think that I was the type to do such a thing. I considered it unsafe and not very healthy. Well, a year (and turning 30) changes a girl.

So, I chatted with Bachelor #4 for about 2 weeks and we exchanged some really hot messages and texts. We finally agreed to meet. He wanted to come straight over to my place, but I told him I would be more comfortable meeting somewhere first (wanted to make sure he wasn't and 80 year old man or an ax murderer). Turns out that he is a really nice guy and we got along really well. The weirdest thing was that when he first saw me he said 'Wow you are even more gorgeous in real life'. I'm really not that photogenic, but it was nice to see that he didn't think I was a troll. I don't think I've ever had a guy act that mesmerized by me before. He seemed genuinely interested in me and impressed with how independent I was. Usually, my fierce Independence sends guys running the other way. Not this one. So, we talked for a while and then went back to my place.

So, should I feel bad or dirty for taking this turn? He was extremely respectful of me and of course we played it safe, but there is a little part (like 15%) that makes me feel like a bit of a skank. Even though I'm not Catholic I feel like I have a bit of that guilt lingering. I even debated about posting this blog, but i figure that this is a part of who I am too and it's just one more adventure to share. I think I wold feel worse about it if I hid it because I actually really enjoyed myself.

(Oh, and what I didn't tell you was that Bachelor #4 is into BDSM and a total ass man. All new territory for me and I won't go into the details (let's just say my ass is sore), but let me tell you that I am certainly going on date #2 with him.)